Preventing Burnout: Delia Petrescu’s Top Tips for Entrepreneurs on the Michael Peres Podcast

Burnout is a growing challenge for entrepreneurs and professionals alike. In this episode of the Michael Peres Podcast, host Michael Peres sits down with Toronto-based psychotherapist Delia Petrescu, founder of Get Reconnected Psychotherapy, to explore the causes, symptoms, and solutions for burnout.

Delia shares her expert insights, practical strategies, and personal experiences to help business owners recognize the warning signs and take proactive steps toward a healthier, more sustainable work-life balance. Whether you’re struggling with stress or looking to prevent burnout before it starts, this conversation offers valuable advice you can put into action today. Watch the video and read the transcript below.

A Conversation with Delia Petrescu – Michael Peres

Michael: Delia, welcome to the podcast.

Delia: Thank you. Thank you for having me today. It’s pleasure.

Michael: Yeah, I’m excited to dive right in. Delia Petrescu is a Toronto-based psychotherapist, psychometrist, and the founder of Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services. Her practice focuses on helping clients manage trauma symptoms, mood, anxiety, and burnout.

She has created an eight week Burnout Reset program. She also offers services for the treatment of life, transition, infertility and relationships. Delia has over a decade of experience working as a psychometrist in various clinical settings, conducting neuropsychological and neurodegenerative assessments.

First and foremost. Delia, how did you get started with all this? That’s awesome.

Delia: I finished a, I have a bachelor in, psychology. And basically I, was always interested in numbers. statistics was, I guess one of my forte. So being a psychologist was the way to go. And it was really interesting work because I was doing basically assessments with people that had traumatic brain injuries, either through car accidents or workplace injuries.

And being in the assessment got me interested in doing the treatment aspect of it as well. So I got into the trauma.

Michael: And you also work with, like helping entrepreneurs with burnouts? is that right?

Delia: Yes. So basically how it started is that when I was doing, when I was working as a psychometrist, I was taking a lot of, assessments here and there, and sometimes I would commute for five hours at a time.

And that was my first experience with burnout. And it got me a little bit more interested about what happens in our brain when we’re getting burned out and what exactly drives the burnout. And the more I learned about it, the more I learned about how I can help myself. I made me realize that I wanna help others as well.

Michael: So just a weird question here, but you’re talking here, people go into accidents and they get blunt force trauma, right? And you’re dealing with people who get burnouts. Is there like a correlation here? So an underlying, is it your just happened to be how it played out?

Delia: No, it just happened to be how it played out. It is just that the way I was doing my work, it led me to burnout, But I think absolutely 99% of people that we know, everybody burns out at one point in their life. So it got just curious about what is the psychology behind it?

And is the burnout affecting our brain in such a way that, it keeps that cycle going.

Michael: Yeah. first and foremost, can you define to me, ’cause I actually talk about burnout all the time. On the show, strangely, I’ve never spoken about burnout. I’m someone who almost has a weirdly bittersweet relationship with burnout.

But everyone on this podcast who I interview, just mentions that word. So I wanna know what’s your definition, first and foremost of what burnout is?

Delia: So burnout is basically, like when I think about burnout, I always like to differentiate between exhaustion and burnout, right? Because a lot of the times, when we’re just tired, we usually throw the word burnout as it goes, right?

So burnout is just chronic stress. So when we’re stressed on, on a daily, like it’s human, it’s natural, it’s something that everybody goes through it. When we don’t, when we don’t close that loop. So it’s basically when we go home And we’re still thinking about work or you’re still checking the email, you’re still going on, like the Slack notifications, right?

You’re prolonging that stress response. So that’s when it’s chronic, when it’s happens over time.

Michael: But here’s the thing that’s almost, that could almost be a byproduct of a person’s lifestyle because when you have a nine to five, people have these clear cut times where they, and they also have very discreet responsibility.

So if you work for a corporate job and you’re in charge of accounting, like you don’t care about sales, you don’t worry about the company loss of sale or close of sale or whatnot, you’re focused on just doing your job good. And so it’s very like narrow and specific, but when you enter the realm of entrepreneurship, it’s a little different because accounting is your responsibility. Sales is your responsibility. The design, marketing, is all your responsibility. And also to compete in this landscape where you’re just a new company dealing with other well-established companies, you have to work all the time. Nine to five is almost a non-existent pipe dream for an entrepreneur.

So I, I wonder, again, like someone works till midnight. I work till midnight all the time. I work till three, four in the morning all the time. How do I dissociate now what would be just me doing what I love doing? Or maybe I have a deeper addiction or maybe that stress is something that’s deeper and that can be considered burnout.

Delia: For sure. And as you’re talking about this, so there, there is a fine line between that, right? I usually tell my clients when I’m in sessions that burnout, just like with any difficult, any, difficult thing in our lives, is always trying to teach you something, right? So with burnout is always trying to teach you to show you like your body’s trying to tell you something about it, right?

So for a lot of people, burnout can come from people pleasing or perfectionism, right? When, you sit on the same project and it takes you a little bit longer than usual or you’re just ruminating after. But as you were talking about that passion for entrepreneurship, it reminds me of there was a Harvard study that was done.

I can’t recall the real, I think it was like 2013, and they were talking about how there are, there’s a difference between a passion and especially when it comes to burnout. So is the harmonious passion and then the obsessive passion. And that’s what differentiates whether someone is gonna lead to burnout or not.

So when you’re hor harmoniously passionate when you just. Care about the business, but when you’re obsessively passionate is that, it doesn’t matter. You’re staying till 2:00 AM even if your like energy level is depleted. A hundred percent.

Michael: Oh, that’s such a good conversation because it’s I guess one is, one is good and one is detrimental. And the worst part is like when you’re doing the one that’s detrimental, but you enjoy it. You know what I’m saying? When you have a problem but you still haven’t even recognized it or you’re okay with the problem and It’s almost a natural progress of trying to do better, because when you’re an entrepreneur and you’re like, the idea, the primitive idea of more is better seems to resonate, right? So if I can work, if I work 12 hours a day, and I get x done. If I work, 15 hours a day, I’ll get X plus some more done, right?

And it’s always more is better. But then. I think the line is when your success in your business comes at the expense of success in other aspects of your life, when the success of your business comes at the success of the relationship of your spouse or your family, or your friends or your parents, or, and the way to look at entrepreneurship is it’s like there’s no point of being super successful in business if you know your quality of life is diminished or if you’re overweight or if you’re not taking care of yourself, or if you’re not happy, you don’t have good self-esteem.

I tend to see that line as it’s okay to be passionate about your business. It’s okay to wanna work all the time, but I think that line for me is when it comes at the expense at other aspects of your life. Okay. And yeah, because like one of those things where yeah, maybe this stress is just a natural part of work.

It’s not necessarily considered burnout or unhealthy territory. And this leads on to just such an important question: you’re having a long day. You’re tired, but you have some more work left to do. And the question is, when is it a smart decision to say, Hey, it’s time to push through and bru force my way through these remaining tasks, or I’m already exhausted.

Perhaps I can kinda recoup, take the night off and start fresh tomorrow and possibly get this task done that I’m trying to do now in a quarter of the amount of time with a refreshed mind.

Delia: Yeah, and the word that he used, refresh mind, that’s like key right there. The thing is, I’ll tell you something about I usually, how I usually deal in therapy sessions with clients is I always refer back to the energy levels.

What’s your battery energy level? So I use the analogy, like same thing when you’re on your phone, if you’re planning to watch a YouTube video, that it’s one hour long and you’re a 2% battery, guess what, you’re not gonna be able to finish watching it. So it’s like the same thing with us.

it’s good to be, honest and ask yourself, okay, what is my battery level right now? Can I still go on and still do this one hour left that I have it’s midnight or 2:00 AM or whatever time it is, or, what’s my energy level, right? do I need, if I’m at a five or 10% battery, chances are I definitely need to recharge somehow.

And the thing is, with recharging is not necessarily about, like sleeping or, watching a movie. It’s whatever you feel that it recharges you. So for a lot of people, it could be just, having a half an hour or just one hour of no notifications, right? Going for a walk or just listening to some music that hypes you up, right?

So it’s like having that little bit of energy up boost.

Michael: I see. So lemme ask you a question. Does Delia ever burnout, and I know you mentioned you did and how did you come around to dealing with it? Yes. what specific masters did you take?

Delia: Yeah, so it, it was all about a lot of reflections and a lot of, awareness that I had to deal with.

But it was, it’s basically same thing that I tell clients is always finding out like, what is the pattern? What gets you there and what are the triggers? When do you realize that, Hey, you know what, I think I’m on the brink of burnout or I’m heading there. So for me, a lot of times when I am taking, if I’m taking more clients than I should or if I’m, like working on blogs or like creating content.

And a lot of the times I work more than 16 hours a day. And some days it’s okay, I don’t burn out. But when I realized that I’m having those thoughts that, you know what, you should just lay down on the couch and binge watch that Netflix series or, crave a lot of chocolate, a lot of sweets.

That’s when I know, hey, you know what? My body’s trying to tell me something.

It’s about to slow down.

Michael: Yeah, more isn’t always better. and that’s something that I struggle with too. But I guess, so I guess what you’re saying is it’s the best way to deal with burnout is to not deal with it at all, is to preempt it, is to learn on the, get those initial markers to read what your body’s telling you and course correct before you head down that downhill spiral.

Delia: So that’s the prevention part of it. But when it, if you’re already into the brink of burnout, a lot of the times we wanna have that quick fix. And when you’re already in the brink of burnout, it’s good to have that reflection and to really think about it:;’ what led me to the burnout, right?

And there’s so many different factors and so many different layers. like we have the always on culture, right? that it’s on. And now nowadays, you have, social media and then you see other entrepreneurs or other business. Is that, they’re posting nonstop, so it gives you that sense that you’re either falling behind.

So it’s whatever, what does it drive? what the, what is the burnout trying to tell you that, are you trying to push yourself to the limits? Are you trying to preserve something? What is it that you’re trying to do?

Michael: Interesting. So going back to my initial question that I thought might’ve been a stupid question where I asked, is there relationship between people getting into car accidents and people dealing with burnout?

And infertility, I’m wondering, as a professional, like yourself, I’m trying to get into your mindset here. I. Is there a common denominator between these various disciplines? Because I find it to be finding it interesting that you help entrepreneurs with burnout and you’re dealing with people with physical blunt force trauma and car accidents.

Have you ever looked at it a little more abstractly and saying, Hey, I see why I’m drawn to this specific industry or industries and some sort of commonality between them.

Delia: Yeah, and I’m glad you asked that, it’s actually a really good question. I think it comes down to the fact it’s, however, all of these aspects, they affect your nervous system, right?

Because same with burnout, because it’s chronic stress, it’s how your nervous system is reacting to it, right? So that’s why we have some people that, like they can work for one year straight and they kept going two hours sleep and not have any vacations and they don’t burn out.

So it’s basically how is their nervous system reacting to the environment, what they’re putting themselves through. And it’s same thing with trauma, right? It’s, basically it’s not the event itself. But it’s how you’re reacting to the, to it and how your nervous system is responding to.

Same thing with infertility, right? Some can say that infertility is a traumatic, interesting response. It’s a trauma, but yeah, it’s how your body responds to it.

Michael: That’s cool because from the outside it seems so almost like confusing, like how you focus on such different stuff. But I, from how you’re framing it Yeah, it’s all perception and I guess once you look at it in that abstract lens, you’re almost solving very different problems with a similar mindset. So what would be the number one tip you’d give to entrepreneurs to, if they knew nothing about this process and if they weren’t on your eight week retreat for healing with burnout, like one quick piece of advice, what would you give to them? Just how to dealing or to prevent burnout.

Delia: So the one quick piece would be, to watch out for that, the energy levels, right? Like the, what are the battery levels? So it’s basic, if, you’re waking up in the morning, a lot of the times we, wake up and we think that our energy is infinite.

Like you wake up and you’re feeling, you know what? I’m just gonna accomplish. You put a lot of things on your to the list, but a lot of the times, even after a good night’s sleep, you might wake up with a 60% battery level, right? And if you’re planning to do something that you would do at a hundred percent, if you’re at 60%, good luck. That’s not gonna happen. and another thing, I would say is to just listen to your body. So your body’s constantly giving you signals, but most of us we’re disconnected and we miss them until we’re actually completely shut down like paying attention, like I said, personally for me, it’s creeping in when, like when I just wanna sit on the couch, binge watch Netflix, and redefining what rest actually means for you.

So what does rest, because rest doesn’t mean necessarily the same thing for everybody. So when it comes to burnout, there’s so many different nuances and so many different layers that it gets to that, but I wanted to just leave with one last thing. There was a research done right after the pandemic, the COVID-19, I think it was about 2021 or 2022, where they found that in order to prevent burnout, you need to have at least two hours of free time on a daily basis. And that free time can mean anything from, like watching Netflix or going for a walk.

Michael: Very interesting.

Delia: Yeah, so it’s basically, if you have less than two hours, that would lead you to the burnout.

And interestingly, if you have more than five hours of free time, that’s actually the opposite, that will lead you into, like not having a directional purpose.

Michael: That’s beautiful. I actually never thought of that. So two hours a day of doing nothing can sometimes help everything else be so much more productive.

Delia: Of you time. Like me time. Yeah. So it could be doing nothing or

Michael: Yeah. Lia how can people get in touch with you?

Delia: So they can get in touch with me at get reconnected ca, the website, also on Instagram, all, the social medias @getreconnected.ca, and LinkedIn, all of them.

Michael: Great. Thank you for your time and wisdom.

Delia: Thank you. Thank you for having me.

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/michael-peres-podcast-entrepreneur-burnout-delia-petrescu/

Why We Obsessively Google Symptoms: The Psychology Behind Health Anxiety

If you’ve ever found yourself at 1:47 a.m., phone glowing in the dark, Googling symptoms like “tingling in left hand heart attack”, you’re not alone. You probably already knew it wasn’t a great idea, maybe you even promised yourself you’d stop googling your symptoms, but somehow, here you are. Again.

Googling symptoms when you’re feeling anxious feels like it should help. You’re looking for reassurance, for that one article or comment that says, “You’re fine, it’s nothing.” And sometimes you do find it… only to feel the panic creep back in hours, or even minutes later.

As a therapist, I’ve had countless conversations about this exact cycle, and I’ve been there myself. This isn’t just curiosity; it’s a way of trying to manage fear. In this post, we’ll explore why we keep Googling, how it fuels health anxiety, and what you can do instead when you feel that urge to search.

A person in a colorful striped sweater sitting on a couch, blowing their nose while searching symptoms on a laptop, illustrating the link between anxiety and googling health concerns.

What Makes Us Google Symptoms in the First Place?

At its core, Googling symptoms is about control. When you feel something strange in your body, like a lump in your throat, a skipped heartbeat, a weird rash, your brain immediately goes: “We need answers.”

And where’s the quickest place to get answers these days? Your phone.

• Desire for certainty: Health anxiety thrives on the idea that if we can just know what’s going on, we can prevent the worst
• Immediate reassurance: We hope a quick search will calm us down, save us a trip to the doctor, and let us get back to our day.
• The illusion of being informed: Searching for information makes us feel proactive, even though we’re often just collecting more reasons to panic.

Real-life spiral example:

One Reddit user said they Googled “jaw tightness” and left convinced they had a heart attack, even though they’d just been chewing gum for hours.

Another searched “gum pain” and spiraled into thinking they had cancer. That’s the thing: Google gives you possibilities, not probabilities…

The Psychology Behind the Spiral…

Intrusive Thoughts and the “What If” Cycle

Health anxiety often starts with a small, intrusive thought: “What if this headache is a brain tumor?” That thought feels urgent, like you need to rule it out right now. Clicking “search” becomes a compulsion, a way to momentarily soothe that spike of fear.

But the relief is short-lived. Why? Because your brain starts filtering for the scariest possibilities. Even if you read a hundred benign explanations, you’ll latch onto the one that matches your worst fear. This is the hallmark of what’s sometimes called hypochondria or hypochondriasis, a pattern of excessive worrying about health conditions.

Doom scrolling and Nervous System Activation

Late-night Googling is particularly brutal. Your body’s already tired, your logical brain is winding down, and your anxiety is in the driver’s seat. Every alarming symptom description fires up your nervous system, keeping you stuck in fight-or-flight mode long after you close your laptop.

You’re not calming your anxiety, you’re training your brain to see the world (and your body) as dangerous. This behavioural pattern can cause unnecessary stress and even lead to unnecessary trips to ER.

What Reddit & Research Reveal About the Real Impact of Googling Symptoms

When you read real stories from people with health anxiety, it’s striking how much they overlap with research findings. Here are some hidden truths we don’t always talk about:

1. Trigger Symptoms → Spirals

Minor sensations (jaw pain, sore gums, tingling) often spark searches. Hours later, people regret even looking.
Research shows people with health anxiety are more likely to interpret harmless bodily sensations as catastrophic.

2. False Reassurance → Escalation

People search for comfort but end up spiralling further when reassurance doesn’t stick. They’re seeking reassurance but finding themselves trapped in a vicious cycle.
This is the “relief-then-escalation” pattern: reassurance is fleeting, but compulsive checking fuels further anxiety.

3. The Regret Loop

Many say: “I wish I could undo that search.” But the next time a symptom appears; they go right back.
This compulsive pattern is a hallmark of cyberchondria

where the vast amount of information available online can overwhelm rather than help.

4. Body Hypervigilance

After reading about certain conditions, people suddenly notice those exact symptoms like the ones they just read about.
Suggestibility is real: some studies found people report stronger sensations after exposure to health information.

5. Specific Irrational Fears

Rabies, ALS, MS, and cancer show up again and again in people’s stories, despite being rare. The hypochondriac tendency is to focus on worst-case scenarios rather than common explanations.

6. Coping Hacks People Try

Timers, writing symptoms down for a doctor, using forums for support. Some even use humour (“indigestion = cancer, obviously”) to normalize their spiral.

Why Googling Makes Anxiety Worse

Health Anxiety + Online Searching = A Real Connection

A systematic review of 16 studies (nearly 5,000 people) also found a solid connection between health anxiety and frequent online research, reinforcing that the more anxious someone is, the more likely they are to scour the Internet for health answers. Some estimates suggest people spend a year in unnecessary medical tests and treatments due to health anxiety and self-diagnosis.

Googling your symptoms when you’re anxious isn’t just unhelpful, it can actually make your anxiety worse because:

• There is temporary relief, long-term harm: the reassurance lasts minutes, maybe hours, before the doubt returns
• Algorithms reward fear: Google shows “clickable” search results first, which often means rare, worst-case scenarios
• Confirmation bias: You’ll unconsciously seek out results that match your fear
• Missed context: Google can’t diagnose you, it doesn’t know your stress level, recent workouts, or whether you’ve had three coffees today

A worried woman wrapped in a beige blanket looking at her phone, showing concern about her health and illustrating the experience of health anxiety.

What We See in Therapy

In sessions, I’ve had clients bring me screenshots of terrifying medical articles, lists of every sensation they’ve felt that week, or confessions like: “I know it’s irrational, but I can’t stop.”

The most common patterns related to health concerns?

• Sleepless nights spent searching for answers.
• Rotating diagnoses… today it’s MS, tomorrow it’s cancer, next week it’s ALS.
• Doubt in doctors – Google starts to feel more believable than a trustworthy health professional or physician.
• Fear of wasting a doctor’s time – so they rely on searches instead of booking an appointment.

The truth is, this isn’t just “overthinking.”

It’s a mix of compulsions, avoidance, and reassurance-seeking, all of which keep anxiety going.

How to Stop the Search Spiral

1. Break the Ritual

•   Delay the search: Give yourself 15 minutes before Googling. More often than not the urge passes.
•   Use a timer: Set a strict limit if you do search and stick to it.
•   Write symptoms down: Save them for a doctor’s appointment instead of searching immediately.
•   Create a “search red flag” list: List topics or phrases you know will spiral you, and commit to avoiding them.

2. Soothe the Nervous System, Not Just the Thought

Anxiety isn’t only in your head, it’s in your body.

•   Grounding exercises: Notice five things you can see, hear, feel, smell, and taste.
•   Breathwork: taking a few deep breaths or trying some of these breathing exercises
•   Gentle movement: Stretch, take a short walk, or do slow breathing to release tension.
•   Talk to someone safe: Share your fear with a trusted friend, not your search bar.

3. Get Real Reassurance

•   See your GP or therapist instead of relying on anonymous forums.
•   Use symptom checkers cautiously, and only ones recommended by a healthcare provider.
•   Explore therapy for health anxiety, like CBT, which helps you tolerate uncertainty without compulsions.

A woman standing outdoors with eyes closed, breathing calmly against a tree, symbolizing recovery and mindfulness after overcoming health anxiety.

FAQs

How do I stop Googling symptoms of anxiety?

Delay the search, write symptoms down, and bring them to a doctor instead. Getting peace of mind from a health professional is far more effective than webbed searches.

Can anxiety make you feel symptoms that aren’t real?

Yes, it can heighten normal sensations or even create physical symptoms.

How do I know if symptoms are real or anxiety?

If symptoms are persistent or worsening, get checked by a doctor. But remember, anxiety can make harmless sensations feel threatening.

Why do I Google every symptom?

Usually to manage fear, but it’s a short-term fix that reinforces anxiety in the long run.

Final Thoughts: What You’re Really Looking For

Here’s the thing, you’re not Googling for information. You’re Googling for safety. You’re searching for proof that you’re okay. But safety doesn’t come from a search engine; it comes from learning to sit with uncertainty and trust your body (and your healthcare team).

If you’re feeling stuck in this loop, you don’t have to untangle it alone. This is exactly the kind of work I help my clients with in therapy – understanding the fear, breaking the compulsions, and building resilience.

If you’re ready to take that step, you can book a virtual session with me here. Together, we’ll help you put your phone down, breathe easier, and start feeling like yourself again!

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/googling-symptoms-anxiety/

September-October 2025 Get Reconnected Newsletter

We have some exciting news to share in this edition of our newsletter. It’s a special one, a bit more promotional than usual, but it’s packed with something meaningful and valuable for you. Here they are:

Delia Petrescu, RP, Speaking at the Canadian Fertility Show – October 18 2025

We’re proud to share that Delia Petrescu, RP, founder of Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services, will be a featured speaker at the Canadian Fertility Show on Saturday, October 18, 2025, at the Westin Harbour Castle in Toronto.

You can also visit Get Reconnected at Booth #1, where we’ll be handing out swag bags filled with thoughtful items and resources to support your fertility and mental health journey.

Delia will deliver her talk, The Infertility Maze: Understanding the Trauma Behind It, exploring the emotional reality of infertility and how trauma-informed therapy can help individuals and couples heal through the process.

In addition to her presentation, Delia will also take part in the Meet the Experts session, where attendees can connect with her directly, ask questions, and learn more about mental health support during fertility treatment.

Read the full press release here.

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Podcast Feature: Trauma Therapy and Healing After Loss

Delia was recently a guest on Fertility Village Live, a weekly show dedicated to honest conversations about infertility, loss, and healing.

In this episode, she talks about the emotional complexity of infertility, pregnancy loss, and stillbirth, and how therapy helps process grief that often goes unseen. Delia also explains how trauma lives in the body, what emotional flashbacks look like, and why grief after infertility is so layered and cyclical.

Watch the full episode here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a3W1aCq8jjU

Read the transcript here: website URL

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Running for Fertility Awareness

The day after her presentation at the Canadian Fertility Show, Delia and the Get Reconnected team will take part in the FM6K charity run on Sunday, October 19, 2025. The event supports fertility awareness and community programs for individuals and couples navigating infertility.

The team has already exceeded their fundraising goal and continues to raise awareness for the emotional and physical challenges tied to infertility and reproductive health. Their participation reflects their commitment to both advocacy and action, bringing visibility to the emotional impact behind every fertility journey.

Support their run or make a donation here: https://raceroster.com/events/2025/102202/2025-fm6k/pledge/participant/39115601

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Published in Wellness on Time Magazine

Delia’s article in Wellness on Time Magazine dives into Revenge Bedtime Procrastination — staying up even when you’re exhausted to reclaim “me time.”

She breaks down what sparks it, why it’s so common now, and steps you can take to change it.
Grab a copy on Amazon: https://www.amazon.ca/Wellness-Time-Magazine-Sleep-Well/dp/1764339606

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Featured Article: How Digital Habits Affect Mental Health

We recently came across a thoughtful piece from A/X Publisher Digital about how constant phone use affects focus, emotions, and relationships.

Read it here:
https://www.axpublisherdigital.com/mobile-phone-are-now-causing-severe-behavioral-changes

It’s a quick, useful reminder that taking breaks from screens helps our minds rest and reconnect with what matters.

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Podcast Feature: The Science of Burnout with Delia Petrescu

Delia recently joined host Michael Peres on his podcast to discuss the science behind burnout and how chronic stress rewires the brain. She shares practical ways to reset the nervous system and regain balance.

In this episode, Delia talks about:

• The difference between exhaustion and burnout
• Why entrepreneurs are prone to chronic stress
• Her eight-week Burnout Reset Program
• Simple ways to regulate the nervous system

Listen here: https://podcast.michaelperes.com/a-conversation-with-delia-petrescu

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/september-october-2025-get-reconnected-newsletter/

Delia Petrescu, MA, RP, Speaking at the Canadian Fertility Show 2025 in Toronto

Toronto, ON — October 14, 2025 — Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services is proud to announce that Delia Petrescu, MA, RP, will be a featured speaker at the Canadian Fertility Show on October 18, 2025, at the Westin Harbour Castle in Toronto.

Delia will present her talk titled “The Infertility Maze: Understanding the Trauma Behind It”, offering compassionate insight into the emotional toll of infertility and the unique ways therapy can support individuals and couples through this journey. 

Drawing from both her professional expertise and personal experience, Delia will explore how unresolved grief, identity challenges, and repeated treatment stress can affect mental health and relationships and how trauma-informed therapy can help foster resilience and healing.

As a Registered Psychotherapist and founder of Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services, Delia specializes in fertility counseling, perinatal mental health, trauma, and relationship therapy. Her practice provides virtual psychotherapy across Ontario, focusing on helping clients reconnect with their capacity to cope and heal.

The Canadian Fertility Show brings together leading professionals in reproductive medicine, mental health, and fertility care to educate and support individuals and couples navigating infertility, IVF, and family-building options.

She will also be at the Meet the Experts session the evening before the conference, and participating in the 6K charity run on Sunday, where she has already exceeded her fundraising goal.

Event Details

Event: Canadian Fertility Show 2025
Date: October 18, 2025
Location: Westin Harbour Castle, Toronto
Topic: “The Infertility Maze: Understanding the Trauma Behind It”
Speaker: Delia Petrescu, RP, Founder, Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services

https://www.canadianfertilityshow.ca/speakers/delia-petrescu/ 

About Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services

Get Reconnected is a Toronto-based psychotherapy practice offering virtual counseling across Ontario. Founded by Delia Petrescu, MA, RP. The practice provides therapy for phobias, ADHD, people pleasing, infertility, trauma, anxiety, depression, and relationship challenges, emphasizing a relaxed, client-centered approach rooted in compassion and expertise.

Media Contact
info@getreconnected.ca
www.getreconnected.ca

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/delia-petrescu-speaking-canadian-fertility-show-2025-toronto/

Pregnancy Loss: Living with the Children Who Never Were

The Psychological Reality of Pregnancy Loss

There’s a particular kind of grief that doesn’t really fit into our cultural narratives about loss.

It’s the grief of losing a baby you never got to meet, a child who existed as an embryo inside your body but never made it home, a pregnancy that ended before it really began.

If you’ve experienced miscarriage, chemical pregnancy, ectopic pregnancy, or stillbirth, you know this grief intimately.

And if it feels more complicated, more persistent, and more profound than others seem to understand, I want you to know: your experience is valid, your grief is real, and you’re not alone in carrying this particular kind of loss.

As someone who’s been through pregnancy losses and who works with people navigating pregnancy loss, I know how profoundly these experiences can affect someone’s sense of safety, identity, and emotional wellbeing.

This isn’t just sadness that passes with time. For many people, pregnancy loss creates lasting psychological impacts that deserve recognition, validation, and proper support, particularly when it involves the loss of pregnancy tissue.

The Weight of What Others Can’t See

One of the most painful aspects of pregnancy loss is that your grief often exists in isolation.

Others can’t see the baby you lost. There might be no photos, no funeral, no tangible evidence of this person who changed your life. And yet, they were real. The pregnancy, including the development of the fetus, was real. The hopes and dreams you built were real. The bond you started forming was real.

This creates what psychologists call disenfranchised grief … a grief that’s not openly acknowledged, socially validated, or publicly mourned.

You might hear comments like “at least it was early,” “you can try again,” “it wasn’t meant to be,” or “everything happens for a reason”, all of which minimize your experience and suggest your grief isn’t warranted.

But your body knew this baby. Your mind prepared for this child. Your heart made room for them. The fact that others didn’t know them doesn’t make your loss of a pregnancy any less significant.

What Happens to Your Brain During Pregnancy Loss

When you become pregnant, your brain immediately begins a remarkable bonding process, even before you’re consciously aware of the pregnancy (REFERENCE)

Hormonal changes trigger neural restructuring in regions associated with caregiving, emotional bonding, and social connection. Your brain literally starts rewiring itself to prepare for motherhood.

Research shows that pregnant women’s brains change in structure within the first trimester, with alterations in gray matter volume in areas involved in understanding and responding to another person’s needs (REFERENCE)

This is why early pregnancy loss can be so devastating. Even if you were only pregnant for a few weeks, your brain had already begun forming attachments and creating mental space for this child.

When pregnancy loss occurs, these neural pathways don’t simply disappear. Your brain has created a schema (a cognitive framework) for this baby, complete with hopes, expectations, and emotional connections.

This is why you might still think about this child months or years later. It’s why you track what would have been their due date or imagine who they would have become. Your brain formed real bonds that persist even after the physical pregnancy, including the connection to the fetus, is gone.

The Many Forms of Pregnancy Loss

Pregnancy loss takes different forms, and each creates its own unique grief experience.

Chemical Pregnancy and Very Early Miscarriage

Chemical pregnancies (losses before 5 weeks) and very early miscarriages can feel particularly invalidating because others often suggest you “barely” lost anything.

But you saw that positive test. In that moment, everything changed. You were pregnant. You started imagining your future with this baby. And then, sometimes within days or weeks, it was over.

The brevity of the pregnancy doesn’t minimize the significance of the loss. You still grieve the future you expected, the child you were preparing for, and the assumptions about how your life would unfold that got shattered due to the risk of miscarriage.

First Trimester Miscarriage

Miscarriage in the first trimester is incredibly common; it affects up to 20% of known pregnancies. But this statistic doesn’t make individual losses any less painful.

By the time miscarriage happens, you might have told family and friends, started making plans, felt pregnancy symptoms that made it all feel real, or even seen an ultrasound.

First trimester loss often involves not just grief but also medical trauma, whether through procedures like D&C, medication to induce miscarriage, or the physical and emotional pain of miscarrying naturally.

Second Trimester and Late Miscarriage

Losses after 12 weeks bring additional layers of grief because you’ve passed the point where pregnancy is supposed to be “safe.”

You had more time to bond, more physical evidence of the pregnancy, often knowledge of the baby’s sex, and sometimes a name chosen. You might have started preparing the nursery or telling more people about your pregnancy.

Late miscarriage can also involve birth, laboring and delivering a baby who has died or won’t survive. This particular trauma of giving birth to loss creates complicated psychological impacts.

Stillbirth

Stillbirth (losing a baby after 20 weeks or during labor) brings a grief that encompasses not just loss but also the trauma of delivery, the shock of expectations destroyed in an instant, and the devastating experience of meeting your baby only to say goodbye.

You expected to bring your baby home. Instead, you left the hospital with empty arms and a body that still shows signs of pregnancy and birth.

The grief of stillbirth includes mourning both the baby who died and all the years of life you expected to have together.

Ectopic Pregnancy

Ectopic pregnancies are medically dangerous and require immediate treatment, but the medical urgency doesn’t erase the fact that you’ve lost a wanted pregnancy.

Ectopic loss often involves emergency procedures, potential loss of a fallopian tube, and the additional trauma of your body being in danger. You’re grieving the baby while also recovering from a medical crisis.

The Unique Nature of Pregnancy Loss Trauma

Pregnancy loss isn’t just grief… for many people, it’s also trauma.

Trauma happens when an experience is too overwhelming to process, leaving you feeling helpless, unsafe, or permanently altered. Pregnancy loss often has all these elements.

Loss of Body Trust

One of the most profound impacts of pregnancy loss is losing trust in your own body.

Your body was supposed to protect and nurture this baby. When it doesn’t (whether through miscarriage, stillbirth, or complications related to the cervix), you might feel betrayed by your own physical self.

You might become hypervigilant about physical sensations, anxious about future pregnancies, or disconnected from your body altogether. This loss of body trust is a form of trauma that affects how safe you feel in your own skin.

Medical Trauma

The medical experiences surrounding pregnancy loss can be traumatic in themselves.

This might include emergency room visits where you’re bleeding and terrified, invasive procedures like D&C or induction, medical providers who are insensitive or dismissive, or having to make impossible decisions about treatment options.

These medical experiences can create lasting trauma responses: anxiety in medical settings, panic around procedures, or avoidance of necessary healthcare.

Shattered Assumptions

Pregnancy loss destroys fundamental assumptions about how life works.

Most people assume that if they get pregnant, they’ll have a baby. This basic expectation feels so certain that when it doesn’t happen, your entire worldview can feel shaken.

You might find yourself questioning everything, whether you can trust your body, whether you’re capable of carrying a pregnancy, whether you’ll ever have the family you imagined, or whether the universe is fundamentally safe or fair.

This loss of assumptive reality is a core feature of trauma.

How Trauma Shows Up After Pregnancy Loss

Trauma responses after pregnancy loss can take many forms:

Hypervigilance and Anxiety

You might find yourself obsessively monitoring your body, unable to relax even if you get pregnant again, constantly scanning for signs something is wrong, or experiencing panic attacks related to pregnancy or medical settings.

Avoidance

This might look like avoiding baby-related situations (showers, stores, social media posts about pregnancy), steering clear of pregnant friends, putting off trying to conceive again even if you want to, or avoiding medical appointments.

Intrusive Thoughts

You might experience flashbacks to the moment you found out about the loss, repetitive thoughts about what you could have done differently, inability to stop imagining different outcomes, or vivid memories that feel like they’re happening in the present.

Emotional Numbing

Some people respond by shutting down emotionally, feeling disconnected from feelings, unable to access joy or excitement even about good things, or experiencing a general sense of flatness or emptiness.

Grief That Doesn’t Follow a Timeline

Unlike what people often expect, grief from pregnancy loss doesn’t follow a neat progression through stages that leads to resolution.

This grief often comes in waves, sometimes years after the loss. Certain dates trigger intense feelings: the due date, the anniversary of the miscarriage, or holidays when you imagined your child would be present.

You might find yourself thinking about who this child, a potential fetus, would have been at different ages, imagining milestones they would have reached, or feeling their absence during family moments.

This isn’t a sign that you’re not healing; it’s a normal response to the loss of a pregnancy. It’s a normal response to a significant loss that shaped who you are.

The Ongoing Presence of Children Lost

Many people who experience pregnancy loss describe an ongoing sense of relationship with the baby, the embryo, or fetus they lost.

You might still think of them by name (or the name you would have given them). You might talk to them in your thoughts, feel their presence during significant moments, or maintain a sense that they’re still part of your family somehow.

This continued connection isn’t denial or an inability to move on. For many people, it’s a meaningful way of honoring the significance of this child in their life.

Your baby existed, even if only for a brief moment in your uterus. They mattered. They changed you, especially in the context of your experiences with gestation and loss. The fact that they didn’t survive doesn’t erase their importance or the love you have for them.

When Pregnancy Loss Needs Professional Support

While some level of grief is normal after pregnancy loss, there are signs that professional support could be helpful:

• Your daily functioning is significantly impaired (trouble working, caring for other children, or handling basic self-care)
• You’re experiencing symptoms of depression or anxiety that persist or worsen over time
• You’re having panic attacks or severe anxiety, especially in medical settings like the emergency department.
• You’re using substances to cope with your grief
• You’re having thoughts of self-harm or suicide related to your experiences with recurrent pregnancy loss.
• Your relationships are severely strained
• You’re unable to imagine a future or make plans
• You’re experiencing PTSD symptoms like flashbacks, nightmares, or severe avoidance

These responses don’t mean you’re weak or handling things poorly. They mean your nervous system has been overwhelmed and needs support to heal.

Healing from Pregnancy Loss Trauma

Healing doesn’t mean forgetting your baby or “getting over” your loss. It means learning to carry this grief in a way that doesn’t overwhelm your ability to engage with life.

Acknowledging the Trauma

Simply recognizing that pregnancy loss can be traumatic (not just sad) can be incredibly validating.

You’re not overreacting. Your body and nervous system experienced something overwhelming, and your responses are normal reactions to abnormal levels of stress and loss.

Trauma-Informed Therapy

Working with a therapist who understands both pregnancy loss and trauma can help you process the experience without retraumatizing yourself, especially when dealing with the physical aspects like cramping.

Effective approaches include Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART) to process traumatic memories and reduce their emotional intensity, EMDR to help integrate the loss and reduce trauma symptoms, somatic therapies to address how your body holds grief and trauma, and Internal Family Systems to work with the different parts of yourself affected by this loss.

Honoring Your Baby

Finding ways to acknowledge and honor your child can be an important part of healing.

This might include creating a small memorial, planting a tree or garden, choosing a meaningful way to mark their due date or loss anniversary, writing letters to your baby, or finding a creative expression (art, music, writing) that honors their significance.

There’s no right way to do this. What matters is finding what feels meaningful to you.

Building Safety

Trauma recovery often starts with helping your nervous system feel safe again.

This might involve developing daily routines that feel grounding, learning techniques for calming your body when grief or anxiety surge, creating physical spaces that feel comforting, or reconnecting with activities and relationships that help you feel more stable.

Moving Forward While Holding Your Loss

One of the most painful myths about pregnancy loss is that moving forward means leaving your baby behind.

But healing doesn’t require forgetting. You can build a meaningful life while still carrying your child in your heart.

Some people eventually have living children and find ways to honor the babies who came first. Others create fulfilling lives without the children they expected to have, navigating the emotional landscape of loss of a pregnancy. Some try again and some don’t.

There’s no single right path forward. What matters is finding what feels authentic for your particular experience and circumstances.

Your baby mattered. Your grief is valid. And you deserve support that honors both the significance of your loss and your need to heal.

Therapy for Pregnancy Loss at Get Reconnected

At Get Reconnected, we provide trauma-informed care specifically for people navigating pregnancy loss and reproductive trauma.

We offer Accelerated Resolution Therapy (ART) to help process the traumatic memories and overwhelming emotions associated with miscarriage, stillbirth, molar pregnancy, and pregnancy loss.

We also integrate Internal Family Systems (IFS), somatic practices, and polyvagal-informed techniques to help regulate your nervous system, rebuild your sense of safety, and honor your baby while supporting your healing.

We understand that pregnancy loss creates both grief and trauma, and that healing requires specialized support that recognizes the unique nature of this experience.

Reach Out for Support

If you’re struggling after pregnancy loss and need support in processing your grief and trauma, you don’t have to heal alone.

At Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services, Delia Petrescu provides compassionate, trauma-informed care for individuals dealing with pregnancy loss and reproductive trauma.

She understands the profound impact of losing a baby, whether through spontaneous abortion or other means, and is here to support your healing process while honoring the significance of your child.

Book a free 15-minute consultation to explore how trauma-informed therapy can support you through this difficult time.

Related Resources

The 9 Stages of Infertility Grief and How to Cope

Trauma of Infertility: Understanding the Emotional and Mental Health Impact of Fertility Struggles

Finding Hope Through the Infertility Journey

Surviving Mother’s Day When You’re Facing Infertility

Frequently Asked Questions

How long will I grieve my pregnancy loss?

There’s no set timeline for grief. For some, acute grief softens within months. For others, waves of grief continue for years, especially around significant dates. Both are normal.

Is it normal to still think about my baby years later?

Yes, absolutely. Many people maintain an ongoing sense of connection to babies they lost, even decades later. This continued connection is a way of honoring their significance.

Can pregnancy loss cause PTSD?

Yes. Research shows that up to 29% of women experience PTSD symptoms after pregnancy loss, particularly after stillbirth or traumatic miscarriage experiences.

Should I try to conceive again?

This is deeply personal, especially for those who have faced recurrent pregnancy loss. There’s no right answer or timeline. Some people feel ready quickly; others need more time. What matters is honoring your own emotional readiness.

Will therapy help if my loss was a long time ago?

Yes. It’s never too late to process pregnancy loss trauma. Many people seek support years after their loss when they realize the grief is still affecting their daily life.

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/pregnancy-loss-grief-trauma/

Gender Differences and ADHD Symptoms: Why Women Are Still Being Undiagnosed

For decades, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) looked like a hyperactive boy who couldn’t sit still in class, got in trouble for talking out of turn, and had parents and teachers throwing their hands up saying “boys will be boys.”
This image mostly came from studies focused on boys with ADHD and children with ADHD, creating a limited understanding of differences between male and female presentations.

This picture was so ingrained in our understanding of ADHD that we missed an entire population of people struggling with the same condition…they just looked different.

If you’re a woman who got diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, you probably have a story about feeling “different” your whole life but not knowing why.

Maybe you were the daydreamer who got called “spacey” or “ditzy.” Maybe you were the perfectionist who worked twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up. Maybe you were the one everyone thought had it all together on the outside while you felt like you were drowning on the inside.

As someone who works with people navigating ADHD diagnoses, I’ve seen how profoundly sex and gender stereotypes have shaped who gets identified, when they get help, and what kind of support they receive.

The research is clear: ADHD affects all genders, but the way it shows up and gets recognized is significantly different depending on whether you’re perceived as male and female.

The “Typical” ADHD Story We All Know

When most people think of ADHD, they picture what we now know was a very narrow representation: a young boy who’s bouncing off the walls, can’t focus in school, gets in trouble for being disruptive, and whose symptoms are impossible to ignore.

This presentation is real and valid, but it’s just one way ADHD can look like.

This traditional understanding of ADHD was based on research on gender differences that was predominantly done on males with ADHD. The diagnostic criteria for ADHD, the criteria for ADHD symptom checklist, even the treatment approaches were all developed around how ADHD typically presents in males.

For decades, this meant that females with ADHD and girls with ADHD were overlooked, misdiagnosed, or told there was nothing wrong with them.

The problem wasn’t that female ADHD didn’t exist. The problem was that their ADHD looked different, and we weren’t looking for different.

How ADHD Symptoms Show Up Differently Across Genders

The Internalizing vs. Externalizing Divide

One of the biggest sex differences in ADHD relates to internalizing versus externalizing symptoms.

Males with ADHD: More likely to show externalizing symptoms such as hyperactivity, impulsivity, and disruptive behaviour – obvious signs that meet traditional expectations for symptoms of ADHD in deficit hyperactivity disorder in children.

These behaviors are hard to miss because they affect other people and disrupt classrooms or workplaces.

ADHD in Females: Tend to have more inattentive symptoms like daydreaming, withdrawal, and perfectionism. They might appear engaged but mentally drift off.

They might work incredibly hard to compensate for their difficulties, leading to exhaustion and anxiety rather than obvious behavioural problems.

Because these differences in ADHD symptoms are less visible, ADHD are more likely to go unnoticed in females than in males. This contributes to an under diagnosed population.

The Perfectionist Mask

Many women with ADHD – and especially females with ADHD diagnosed later in life – develop what researchers call “masking” behaviors.
They learn to hide their symptoms and overcompensate for their difficulties.

This might look like becoming a perfectionist, working twice as hard as their peers, or developing elaborate organizational systems to manage their challenges.

From the outside, it might look like they have everything together. They might be high achievers in school or work, but the cost is enormous internal stress, anxiety, and exhaustion.

Because they’re not failing in obvious ways, their ADHD goes unrecognized while they suffer in silence.

This often happens more in females than males due to societal expectations, hiding difficulties with elaborate systems. While effective in appearances, the emotional cost is high.

Emotional Dysregulation

Women with ADHD often experience intense emotional reactions, rejection sensitivity, and difficulty managing their emotional responses.

But instead of these being recognized as ADHD symptoms, they’re often misattributed to being “too sensitive,” “dramatic,” or having anxiety or mood disorders.

This emotional component of ADHD is real and significant, but it doesn’t fit the traditional hyperactive model, so it gets overlooked or misunderstood.

Why Girls and Women Get Missed

Societal Expectations Shape What We See

Societal expectations for male and female behaviour shape how ADHD is noticed.

Boys with hyperactivity are seen as needing intervention, girls with ADHD may be called dreamy or creative rather than having a neurodevelopmental condition.

A girl who’s hyperactive might be told she’s “too much” or needs to “calm down,” but she’s less likely to be referred for ADHD evaluation.

Boys who display hyperactive or disruptive behaviours are more likely to be seen as having a problem that needs intervention. Girls with the same underlying neurology might just be told to try harder or be more organized.

Additionally, differences in ADHD symptoms and differences in symptom presentation mean gender differences in adult ADHD are real, with diagnostic systems slow to adapt.

The Quiet Struggle Goes Unnoticed

Inattentive ADHD…the type that involves difficulty focusing, being easily distracted, and struggling with organization…is much less disruptive to others than hyperactive-impulsive ADHD.

A child who’s quietly daydreaming in the back of the classroom doesn’t disrupt the lesson the way a child who’s getting up and moving around does.

This means that many girls and women with ADHD slip through the cracks not because their symptoms are less severe, but because their symptoms are less obvious to others.

Hormones Complicate the Picture

ADHD symptoms can fluctuate with hormonal changes, and women experience more dramatic hormonal shifts throughout their lives than men.
Hormonal changes during puberty, throughout the menstrual cycle, in pregnancy, and during menopause can influence ADHD symptoms, often making them more difficult to recognize and manage.

Many women first notice their ADHD symptoms becoming unmanageable during major hormonal transitions, but because these changes coincide with life stressors (like having children or going through menopause), the ADHD often gets overlooked in favour of situational explanations.

Hormones complicate recognition. In child and adolescent years, puberty changes ADHD impact, but this has rarely been considered in ADHD clinical setting until more recently.

The Misdiagnosis Pipeline

Because women’s ADHD symptoms often look different from the traditional presentation, they frequently get misdiagnosed with other conditions before anyone considers ADHD.

Anxiety and Depression

Women are often diagnosed with anxiety or depression before ADHD is considered, despite the prevalence of ADHD being similar between male and female populations. This is partly due to sex differences in symptom presentation and a lack of clinician training in gender differences in adult cases.

Women with undiagnosed ADHD often develop anxiety and depression as secondary conditions. When you’re constantly struggling to keep up, feeling like you’re not meeting expectations, and working harder than everyone else just to function, anxiety and depression are natural results.

But these secondary conditions often get treated as the primary problem, while the underlying ADHD continues to go untreated.
Someone might spend years in therapy for anxiety without anyone realizing that the anxiety is partly driven by untreated ADHD.

Eating Disorders

There’s a significant overlap between ADHD and eating disorders, particularly in women. People living with ADHD may face challenges like acting impulsively, finding it hard to manage emotions, and striving for perfection, which together can increase the likelihood of developing unhealthy eating patterns.

But again, the eating disorder might be treated without addressing the underlying neurodivergence.

Borderline Personality Disorder

The emotional intensity and rejection sensitivity that many women with ADHD experience can sometimes be misinterpreted as borderline personality disorder.

While some people may have both conditions, it’s important that ADHD gets considered as a potential explanation for emotional dysregulation.

The Late Diagnosis Experience

Many women don’t get diagnosed with ADHD until they’re adults, often after their own children are diagnosed or after a major life change makes their symptoms impossible to ignore anymore.

The Relief and the Grief

Getting an ADHD diagnosis as an adult often brings a complex mix of emotions. There’s relief at finally having an explanation for lifelong struggles, but there’s also grief for all the years of feeling different, trying harder than everyone else, and not understanding why things that seemed easy for others were so difficult.

Many women describe feeling angry about all the opportunities they might have missed, relationships that suffered, or potential that went unrealized because their ADHD wasn’t recognized and treated.

Reframing Your Life Story

An adult ADHD diagnosis often requires reframing your entire life story. Suddenly, things that you blamed yourself for (being disorganized, struggling in school despite being smart, having difficulty maintaining friendships, or feeling overwhelmed by daily tasks) start to make sense in a different way.

This reframing can be incredibly healing, but it can also be disorienting as you adjust to understanding yourself through a new lens.

Men’s ADHD Isn’t Always Obvious Either

While we’ve focused primarily on how women’s ADHD gets missed, it’s important to acknowledge that men can also be misunderstood or misdiagnosed, particularly if they don’t fit the hyperactive stereotype.

Inattentive Men Fly Under the Radar

Men with primarily inattentive ADHD might also be overlooked, especially if they’re not disruptive.

They might be seen as lazy, unmotivated, or just not living up to their potential, without anyone considering that attention difficulties might be the underlying issue.

Different Masking Strategies

Men with ADHD might develop different masking strategies than women.

They might become class clowns, focus intensely on specific interests, or channel their hyperactivity into sports or other physical activities. These strategies might help them cope but can also delay recognition of their ADHD.

Emotional Symptoms Get Overlooked

Men with ADHD also experience emotional dysregulation and rejection sensitivity, but these symptoms might be even less likely to be recognized in men due to societal expectations about male emotional expression.

The Intersection of Gender and Other Identities

It’s important to recognize that gender doesn’t exist in isolation…it intersects with other aspects of identity that can further complicate ADHD recognition and treatment.

The Intersection of Gender and Other Identities

It’s important to recognize that gender doesn’t exist in isolation…it intersects with other aspects of identity that can further complicate ADHD recognition and treatment.

LGBTQ+ Considerations

Transgender and non-binary individuals may face unique challenges in getting appropriate ADHD care, particularly if their gender identity isn’t respected by healthcare providers or if their symptoms don’t fit traditional gender-based expectations.

Socioeconomic Factors

Access to ADHD evaluation and treatment is significantly affected by socioeconomic status. Girls and women from lower-income families might be less likely to receive comprehensive evaluations or ongoing treatment, even when their symptoms are recognized.

Moving Toward Better Recognition and Treatment

The good news is that awareness of gender differences in ADHD is growing, and diagnostic practices are slowly evolving to be more inclusive and comprehensive.

Updated Diagnostic Criteria

Mental health professionals are becoming more aware of how ADHD can present differently across genders.

Updating diagnostic criteria for ADHD to reflect differences between male and female experiences – including those without ADHD for comparison will improve outcomes.

Greater attention to sex and gender research, differences in ADHD symptoms, and ADHD in girls ensures clinicians better understand the reason for these gaps.

Specialized Assessment

Some clinicians now specialize in evaluating ADHD in women and girls, using assessment tools and approaches that are more sensitive to how the condition presents in these populations.

Comprehensive Treatment Approaches

Treatment for ADHD is increasingly recognizing the need for comprehensive approaches that address not just the core symptoms, but also the secondary effects like anxiety, depression, and self-esteem issues that often develop when ADHD goes unrecognized.

If You’re Wondering About Yourself

If you’re reading this and recognizing yourself in these descriptions, it might be worth exploring whether ADHD could explain some of the challenges you’ve experienced. This is particularly worth considering if:

● You’ve always felt “different” but couldn’t explain why
● You work much harder than others to achieve the same result
● You struggle with organization and time management despite trying numerous systems
● You have difficulty focusing, especially on tasks that aren’t immediately interesting
● You experience intense emotions or rejection sensitivity
● You’ve been diagnosed with anxiety or depression but treatments haven’t fully addressed your symptoms
● You have a child or family member with ADHD and you’re noticing similarities

Here is an ADULT ADHD Self-Rated Symptom Checklist that you can use as a prescreener.

Getting Proper Evaluation and Support

If you suspect you might have ADHD, it’s important to work with a mental health professional who understands how the condition can present differently across genders. Look for someone who:

● Has experience evaluating ADHD in adults
● Understands gender differences in ADHD presentation
● Uses comprehensive assessment tools, not just brief questionnaires
● Considers your full history, including childhood experiences and family history
● Looks at how symptoms affect your daily functioning, not just whether you fit a narrow stereotype

What to Expect from Evaluation

A comprehensive ADHD evaluation should include detailed interviews about your current symptoms and childhood history, standardized rating scales, and consideration of other conditions that might explain your symptoms. The process might take multiple appointments and should feel thorough rather than rushed.

Treatment is Individualized

If you are diagnosed with ADHD, remember that treatment should be tailored to your specific needs, symptoms, and life circumstances. What works for someone else might not work for you, and that’s okay. Treatment might include medication, therapy, lifestyle changes, or accommodations at work or school.

The Importance of Accurate Diagnosis

Getting an accurate ADHD diagnosis (whenever it happens in your life) can be transformative. It’s not just about getting access to treatments (though that’s important). It’s about understanding yourself, reframing your struggles, and developing strategies that actually work with your brain rather than against it.

For women who have spent years feeling like they were failing at things that seemed easy for everyone else, understanding that their brain works differently can be incredibly validating. It doesn’t excuse challenges, but it explains them and opens up new possibilities for support and success.

The goal isn’t to use ADHD as an excuse or to lower expectations for yourself. The goal is to understand how your brain works so you can develop strategies that actually help you thrive, rather than continuing to struggle with approaches that weren’t designed for your neurology.

Your struggles are real, your experiences are valid, and you deserve support that acknowledges and addresses how your brain actually works…not how other people think it should work.

If you’re wondering whether ADHD might explain some of your lifelong struggles, or if you’ve been recently diagnosed and need support navigating this new understanding of yourself, you don’t have to figure it out alone.

At Get Reconnected Psychotherapy Services, Sep Nikmanesh and Adam Adivi provide comprehensive support for adults with ADHD, including help processing late diagnoses and developing strategies that work with your unique brain.

Book a Free 15 Minute consultation with Adam and a Free 15 Minute Consultation with Sep to explore how Sep and Adam can support you in understanding and managing your ADHD.

source https://getreconnected.ca/blog/adhd-gender-differences-women-undiagnosed/